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black suitcase



A medium-sized black suitcase in good condition.

Why It’s Here:

I don’t know!  I mean, christ, it’s a perfectly decent suitcase!  I try to come up with reasons for this stuff, but c’mon!  eBay!  Craigslist!  This isn’t a half-emptied bottle of only best offers discount viagra pills avocado-rum hair gel, people, it’s a freakin’ suitcase.  It’s got little wheels and everything!  You can sell this!  You can turn this directly into money with minimal effort!

Though maybe there were body parts inside or something.  I didn’t check.

Probable Recipient:

Someone who is going to be all “holy crap, I can’t believe someone was just giving this away!  It’s a sweet-ass suitcase!  They must be a real idiot, whoever they are!  Seriously!”  Seriously!

Or it might be a zombie suitcase:

You know, like in that George Romero movie.

You know the one I’m talking about.

Samsonite of the Living Dead.

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