Pan, Glasses and Magazines
Hey there! You know what’s been kind of bugging me about the ol’ Swapmeet (other than that me-not-updating-it thing)?
Everything is out of date! You might not realize this, but most of the photos that have been posted since, like August? Were taken back in August. There was a real big pile of action down on the swapmeet table around then, and as a result I got a lot of pictures. And since I was doing one item at a time, those pictures lasted a long dang time.
As a matter of fact, I still have a backlog. And it’s been killing my morale, and that’s just about enough of that.
So to heck with that! Let’s jump to the present, dump the one-item-per-entry thing, and just see what’s going on in the laundry room, goddammit! Are you ready? Yes! You are totally ready! Let’s go!

Two decorative christmas-y wine glasses, and a small metal frying pan with a wooden handle! These showed up independent of each other, I think, but they’ve been hanging out together down there for a few days now; seems like no one wants either.
Consider that those are not particularly over-sized glasses: that is one tiny little frying pan. I’m thinking a dwarf got his second growth and is upsizing.

Detail shot of the pan. I kind of feel like mocking its smallness and crappiness is the clear path, but for some reason I find the handle on this thing just plain charming. And that little metal hook or loop or whatever you want to call it, on the end there? I don’t know if it came standard or got customed in by the dwarf or what, but I like it. Very rustic utilitarian.
Maybe it’s not a dwarf at all. Maybe it’s a giant descendent of William Burroughs, and this is the belt-loop spoon he keeps around for cooking up–but he’s kicking, man, he’s kicking that dang old giant-sized horse and he doesn’t need this stuff anymore. If a hypodermic the size of a turkey baster shows up, I’m going to consider it a closed case.

Ho ho ho! It’s frickin August, okay? Nobody wants a glass with christmas trees and snow on it. It’s like stopping at a news stand in the middle of the Sahara and picking up a copy of Water Monthly. No. No thank you. These glasses are going to sit on the table until at least Thanskgiving, if someone doesn’t destroy them in a fit of heat exhaustion first.

Oprah is just fucking thrilled to be Oprah. In the mean time, Andre Agassi is just happy to be on a magazine cover. You know what I miss? The mullet. That dang mullet. That was a rebel, Andre. That guy, over there, who you used to be.

And this happy crowd? This is me giving back to the swapmeet. We cleaned out the cleaning supplies last weekend; this is all the stuff we just don’t use. The iron is fine, but we got a new one; the detergent is fine except it smells way too much. (I put signs on both of those, since either could be conceivably mistaken for non-swapmeet laundry paraphernalia.)
The spray bottles were occupying niches we just didn’t need filled; and I don’t need those Clorox things because I live in a state of constant, willful filth and it’d be kind of antithetical to have it around.
And what about that speckled-out blob in front of it all? What, indeed! Introducting a new feature: What the Hell is That?
The way WtHiT works is, I don’t tell you what it is. And you’re all “What the hell is that?” And I’m all, “nuh uh, not telling.” And you’re all, “wait, I bet I totally know.” And I’m all like, “yeah, well, leave a comment or something then, smart-face.”
Aaaaaaaaaaand scene. There’s your first big old round-up digest-type post. It’s a change–end of an era and all that, I know, break out the kleenex–but if it’s one of these every weekish or so vs. the old style with months-long breaks, I’m kinda leaning toward this. Let me know what you think, natch.
Josh Millard Said,
August 15, 2007 @ 9:02 pm
Also, curious: I must have done something slightly different in my photo cropping (you know, the cropping I used to do, like a year ago, when I was taking pictures last?), because these images are sliiiiightly bigger and it kind of jacks up the look of the entry.
I could go back and fix it, but (a) that’d be time consuming, and (b) if I leave it alone it’ll function as a cautionary tale.
Mike Said,
August 16, 2007 @ 6:38 am
Hrm… it looks yellow. And small. And it’s associated with cleaning supplies…
My guess is a small yellow cup.
Jinnet Said,
August 16, 2007 @ 11:14 am
I’m guessing a big yellow sponge!
secretariat Said,
August 16, 2007 @ 8:32 pm
Is it a kitten?
Josh Millard Said,
August 17, 2007 @ 6:45 am
Zero for three! Although, in defense of all y’all, there’s really seriously no way you’re going to get it. It’s just that dang mysterious.
deborah Said,
August 18, 2007 @ 12:34 am
A rubber ducky? And I’ve been meaning to ask you something. Do you ever take any of the stuff left on the table?
Josh Millard Said,
August 18, 2007 @ 10:03 pm
I think I’ve taken things a couple times. It’s rare—I try to avoid collecting random crap, so someone has to abandon something that either charms me right past my anti-kitsch barriers or is genuinely useful.
My wife has snagged a couple things I think. And a couple other things have been asked after long after they left the table—that damned time-lag again.